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Curious and Curiouser Podcast

Oct 3, 2017

On this week’s episode of Curious & Curiouser, Tracey and Cayly are talking about how to make friends as adults (SO hard, you guys) and their experiences in building community in their lives.


This conversation is a response to yet another listener question, in which a question-asker who shall remain nameless sent in the following inquiry: 


Have you cultivated your communities intentionally and how have you handled adjusting the people in your communities as you — and others — evolve?


Great question, anonymous listener!


Tracey and Cayly have talked about social decluttering on at least two previous episodes, and were glad to have the opportunity to revisit this topic one more time. In this discussion, they talk about how their communities have developed over the years, explore the challenges of making friends as adults, and offer advice on how to begin cultivating community more intentionally in your own life.


Listen, enjoy, and then share this conversation with your friends! And leave reviews and 5-star ratings in iTunes if you feel so inclined. Tracey and Cayly would really appreciate it!


Highlights from the episode:


- Episode 4 on Social Decluttering (

- Episode 23 on Dating, Authenticity, and Social Decluttering revisited (

- Episode 28 on Jealousy and Mean Girls (

- Community for Tracey and Cayly as conglomerations of friends from different parts of our lives

- What happened when Tracey brought various members of her community together for her birthday this year

- What is Cayly’s number one criteria for determining who she decides to spend time with

- How Tracey’s relationship with her family of origin has influenced the community she has created

- Do Tracey and Cayly still have friends from their high school years?

- Why does Cayly think she has so few friends from high school and college?

- How being vulnerable with others fosters intimacy and community

- Brene Brown on The Anatomy of Trust (

- How divorce helped Tracey learn about the importance of asking for help

- Moving towards uncomfortable emotions to help foster community

- The Difference Between Empathy & Sympathy by Brene Brown (

- Acknowledging another person’s painful emotions without trying to fix them or sugarcoat them

- The challenge of meeting new friends as adults

- Cheryl Strayed ( and Dear Sugars on friendships ending (

- How to adjust the people that are in your community as you and your needs change

- Is social decluttering ever the kind thing to do? Can you break up with a friend without ruffling feathers?

- Have Tracey and Cayly been socially decluttered from other people’s lives? How has that gone for them?

- How being yourself helps cultivate your community

- Do we stay friends with people even when it is inconvenient?

- And more!